Six Dos And Don’ts Of A Zombie Apocalypse

16 Oct

Recently, I noticed someone had ended up at this blog using the search term ‘What to do and not do in a zombie apocalypse’. I thought this was an interesting idea, and decided to put together six tongue-in-cheek dos and don’ts on a zombie apocalypse. So with no further ado, they are:

1. When the zombies start to rise, do head for the hills as quickly as possible. Don’t stand in the middle of the road, waving your arms in the air while screaming at the top of your lungs.

2. When the zombies are hammering at the door, do pile all the furniture you can find against it. Don’t throw it wide open and invite them in for a bite to eat.

3. When trying to kill zombies, do aim for the head. Don’t shoot wildly at anything which moves until you run out of bullets.

4. When you see a zombie in the middle of the road, do put the pedal to the metal and mow it down without a second thought. Don’t pull over and offer it a lift.

5. When fleeing from a zombie horde, do run as fast as you can. Don’t stop to re-tie your shoelaces just because they feel a little tight.

6. When hiding in your safe house, do keep quiet and make as little noise as possible. Don’t crank the stereo up and invite the neighbours round for a wild party.

If you have your own tongue-in-cheek dos and dont’s for a zombie apocalypse, feel free to post them as comments on this article.



*****************************************************************************
From the author of For Those In Peril On The Sea, a tale of post-apocalyptic survival in a world where zombie-like infected rule the land and all the last few human survivors can do is stay on their boats and try to survive. Now available in print and as a Kindle ebook. Click here or visit www.forthoseinperil.net to find out more. To download a preview of the first three chapters, click here.

To read the Foreword Clarion Review of For Those In Peril On The Sea (where it scored five stars out of five) click here.

Advertisements

5 Responses to “Six Dos And Don’ts Of A Zombie Apocalypse”

  1. mtnfeath 16/10/2013 at 20:30 #

    Number 3 might be the only one I have a little trouble with πŸ˜›

    • cmdrysdale 17/10/2013 at 09:27 #

      A bit of practice and I’m sure you’d be popping off head shots like the best of them.

      • mtnfeath 18/10/2013 at 09:45 #

        I’d certainly give it my best shot!

  2. RStorey 17/10/2013 at 00:04 #

    When a zombie virus is ravaging civilization, do break out that good pair of walking shoes, even though they clash with your outfit. Do not put on a pair of high heels.

    • cmdrysdale 17/10/2013 at 09:22 #

      Nice one! I’ll need to take those six inch stilettos out of my zombie apocalypse preparedness kit!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s